This is the Face of IBS

This is the face of IBS. This is today. In a stall at work. A normal day, just like any other. Then it suddenly happens. A slight cramp of the stomach. A feeling of dread. Your mind racing to what you ate prior to this - did it have onion in it? Garlic? Another trigger that you missed? But you were so careful.

This is the face of person hiding in her office bathroom. She is in a pain that you can't notice from a snapshot. Her body is seemingly failing her or punishing her for attempting to live a life. This is the Face of IBS.

Here is what you don't see on the face. You don't see my hand putting pressure on my abdomen because I have talked myself into believing the pressure helps the pain. It doesn't, but habit has me do this anyway if for nothing else but the placebo effect.

You can't see the wave of pure exhaustion that washed over my body. I started out the day with so much energy, ready to tackle the pile of projects that awaited me. However the cramping leads to an exhaustion that makes me feel numb and heavy all at once. I am aware of my limbs, but they seem detached and heavy to move.

You can't see my right leg shaking from exertion and attempting to sway me away from the pain. You can't see the cold sweat that has started to form on my back. You can't hear my brain repeat a mantra that pain is only temporary, pain is only temporary. You can't see the smile that was there prior to this. The life that was there prior to this. 

This is a face that got sucker punched to the gut. This is a face that left work early to hide under the covers until the pain runs its course.

But, I have gotten ahead of myself. I wanted to paint you a picture of what it is like to have your day change suddenly due to something you can't control.

IBS or Irritable Bowel Syndrome is a package of symptoms that cause digestive distress. Let me preface this by saying - those that have Inflammatory Bowel Disease (IBS) such as Chron's or Celiac are in a completely different category.

IBS may come with similar symptoms, but it does not come with similar consequences. My episode will pass eventually and leave no lasting mark on my body save for another memory. My stomach will have no extra ulcers. My intestines will not be inflamed. My risk of cancer will not be heightened. I try my best to make sure to think of the brighter side like this. It doesn't help in the moment, but it allows me to keep it in perspective.

IBS is what is called a "diagnosis of exclusion." Meaning, I have been run through a gamut of tests for the more serious diseases and they aren't there. So, boom, IBS. 

I intend to use this blog as a way to discuss what life is like with IBS. I am not a doctor. I am only me: an office drone with a chronic illness that she isn't afraid to go into detail about (hence, the TMI part of my blog title).

So yes, things will get a bit "too much information" for some. I will do my best to put a warning before I go into such detail. Things that happen to me will make those with IBD perhaps shake their heads and wish they had my problem. I get that too.

The reason I wanted to start this blog (aside as a way of trying to get out everything about this mess) is for anyone else also suffering from IBS that may not have someone to talk to. On Facebook, when I am having a flare-up, I usually post a status about it. Nothing graphic, but it allows those that care about me know that today is probably not the best day to contact me.

Those status posts led to messages from people on my friend's list wanting to know more. Whether they are experience similar symptoms or they recently met someone that has the same issue and are more comfortable asking me than their new friend.

Either way, I have learned not to be shy when it comes to my IBS. If you really want to know, I can describe in wonderful, vivid detail of what comes out of my body. Not everyone is at this point and some will never get to this point.

I only got to this point because this is going to be a part of my life for the long haul. I can do things to lessen the blow, but there is going to come a time that I will be curled up in bed wondering if I should chance a cracker just to get something into my system.

So yes, I will be here. I can only tell you my experiences. Everyone with this experiences things differently. A trigger for them may not be a trigger for me or vice versa (example: I know people that cannot tolerate eggs, however they are one of my main safe food go-tos).

And if you have a question or comment; go for it. Share. Get it off your chest. Know that you are not alone. And if you have an anonymous question you can email me at thetmiofibs@gmail.com.

Welcome to The TMI of IBS....this will be a journey in bowels.